Deep inside of him
The voices of the announcers echoed through my mind. That moment was on repeat.
“And it’s in the net! It’s done, the game is over. The Mastermind and his team has now fallen in overtime and will be relegated out of the league. But what an excited end to an intense series that went the distance”.
Out into the storm I went barefooted. I headed to the train station. Time for me to go home. It was indeed go big or go home with this last season. The only thing we did was letting down the org and the fans. I had no attachment to neither one so I’m fine. After a couple of seasons of mediocrity it finally came to a point where we couldn’t keep up with the league.
“It’s sad to see a legend leave. We still know he has it in him to get back to his peak performance, but it did not show this season. Another one of the OG five has retired and I can understand why”.
I haven’t lift that trophy since season one. At that time I was the best in the world, the mastermind behind my team’s success. Am I just washed up? It can’t be, I was the best player on our team this last season. The new Meta has to be the problem. I haven’t adapted to it over the years and it has lead me here.
“Shawn!” shouted a familiar man.
He sat in a red Mini Cooper. The car was filled up with people.
“Dad?” I said confused.
“Get in son” he said.
Well, I suppose dad was going to pick me up. I left a message for him on voicemail after all. But I never thought he would show up. Mother was busy working this weekend so I decided to take the train home. However, I haven’t seen dad since my mother left him. He has been absent most of my life, as I wanted him to be.
“But it’s too full dad” I said. “And I already have a ticket”.
“Oh,” he said. “Well, I… guess I…”
At that moment something came over me. My mind said to continue walking while my inner desire woke up.
“Fine dad” I said. “So where do I sit?”
“Janet! Get out!” he said.
A spot at the front seat opened up. I sat down next to dad. He signaled Janet and she sat on my lap. The door closed and I sat uncomfortably in dad’s little car. Janet’s legs lay outstretch over my lap to dad’s lap. My head lay on her lap.
“Take good care of my son Janet” he said while we drove home. “He’s hurting”.
Her hand stroked my hair. My body was in pain but I felt more relaxed than ever. Before I was just feeling anger and pain. Pain over my own failure, pain over that I’ve called it quits. I’ve given up, it’s not fun to give up.
Dad dropped off the last person and then he parked near the apartment. We walked towards it and dad started talking to himself. He started talking about people he have to meet at the coffee shop in order to get free coffee. Then he mumbled a list of people he have to meet today. I just listened to him. Eventually we arrived outside the apartment.
“If anything like this happen again son,” dad said. “Call me. I’ll pick up, I might have not picked up this time but I will, I will. I promise you that son.”
Dad stared right into my soul and said: “I’ll do anything for you Shawn, you know that?”
I bite my on lip. My emotions were swelling up and I tried my best to not cry. Dad, he saw that.
“Well,” he began. “Maybe not anything. If you break into somewhere need a getaway I will not be there. Seriously, I will not be there. Just turn yourself in, son. Promise me you do that.”
“Yes dad” I said. “I’ll turn myself in”.
“Good” he said.
We hugged and he started walking down stairs. That moment was going to be on repeat. The moment when I learned that deep inside of him, he cared. He cared about me, even though I never gave him the chance to show it. But now I will.
“Maybe,” I said. “We can see each other’s more if you can make some time”.
“Yes,” he said. “I’ll put you my schedule”.
“Thanks dad” I said.
Dad waved goodbye. I walked inside and started practicing. Every day I practiced and analyzed replays. Some of the days dad and I met up. He has always been a busy man, he can’t stop socializing, but I saw that he tried. He tried to be with me now that I want to be with him. This happiness that I’ve been longing for has renewed my motivation to play. To win.
“The Mastermind is back” one of the announcers said.
“Indeed he is,” the other one said. “And from what I’ve heard, when it comes to scrims, he is beast on the field. He’s like a changed man. I can’t wait to see him play on this new roster, and the match has started!”
Months later I found myself at the grand finale. It was this season I took my second title at LAN. But this time my dad was in the crowd, cheering for me. I have always longed deep inside of me to have a dad. I now I have one.
Deep inside of him
The voices of the announcers echoed through my mind. That moment was on repeat.
“And it’s in the net! It’s done, the game is over. The Mastermind and his team has now fallen in overtime and will be relegated out of the league. But what an excited end to an intense series that went the distance”.
Out into the storm I went barefooted. I headed to the train station. Time for me to go home. It was indeed go big or go home with this last season. The only thing we did was letting down the org and the fans. I had no attachment to neither one so I’m fine. After a couple of seasons of mediocrity it finally came to a point where we couldn’t keep up with the league.
“It’s sad to see a legend leave. We still know he has it in him to get back to his peak performance, but it did not show this season. Another one of the OG five has retired and I can understand why”.
I haven’t lift that trophy since season one. At that time I was the best in the world, the mastermind behind my team’s success. Am I just washed up? It can’t be, I was the best player on our team this last season. The new Meta has to be the problem. I haven’t adapted to it over the years and it has lead me here.
“Shawn!” shouted a familiar man.
He sat in a red Mini Cooper. The car was filled up with people.
“Dad?” I said confused.
“Get in son” he said.
Well, I suppose dad was going to pick me up. I left a message for him on voicemail after all. But I never thought he would show up. Mother was busy working this weekend so I decided to take the train home. However, I haven’t seen dad since my mother left him. He has been absent most of my life, as I wanted him to be.
“But it’s too full dad” I said. “And I already have a ticket”.
“Oh,” he said. “Well, I… guess I…”
At that moment something came over me. My mind said to continue walking while my inner desire woke up.
“Fine dad” I said. “So where do I sit?”
“Janet! Get out!” he said.
A spot at the front seat opened up. I sat down next to dad. He signaled Janet and she sat on my lap. The door closed and I sat uncomfortably in dad’s little car. Janet’s legs lay outstretch over my lap to dad’s lap. My head lay on her lap.
“Take good care of my son Janet” he said while we drove home. “He’s hurting”.
Her hand stroked my hair. My body was in pain but I felt more relaxed than ever. Before I was just feeling anger and pain. Pain over my own failure, pain over that I’ve called it quits. I’ve given up, it’s not fun to give up.
Dad dropped off the last person and then he parked near the apartment. We walked towards it and dad started talking to himself. He started talking about people he have to meet at the coffee shop in order to get free coffee. Then he mumbled a list of people he have to meet today. I just listened to him. Eventually we arrived outside the apartment.
“If anything like this happen again son,” dad said. “Call me. I’ll pick up, I might have not picked up this time but I will, I will. I promise you that son.”
Dad stared right into my soul and said: “I’ll do anything for you Shawn, you know that?”
I bite my on lip. My emotions were swelling up and I tried my best to not cry. Dad, he saw that.
“Well,” he began. “Maybe not anything. If you break into somewhere need a getaway I will not be there. Seriously, I will not be there. Just turn yourself in, son. Promise me you do that.”
“Yes dad” I said. “I’ll turn myself in”.
“Good” he said.
We hugged and he started walking down stairs. That moment was going to be on repeat. The moment when I learned that deep inside of him, he cared. He cared about me, even though I never gave him the chance to show it. But now I will.
“Maybe,” I said. “We can see each other’s more if you can make some time”.
“Yes,” he said. “I’ll put you my schedule”.
“Thanks dad” I said.
Dad waved goodbye. I walked inside and started practicing. Every day I practiced and analyzed replays. Some of the days dad and I met up. He has always been a busy man, he can’t stop socializing, but I saw that he tried. He tried to be with me now that I want to be with him. This happiness that I’ve been longing for has renewed my motivation to play. To win.
“The Mastermind is back” one of the announcers said.
“Indeed he is,” the other one said. “And from what I’ve heard, when it comes to scrims, he is beast on the field. He’s like a changed man. I can’t wait to see him play on this new roster, and the match has started!”
Months later I found myself at the grand finale. It was this season I took my second title at LAN. But this time my dad was in the crowd, cheering for me. I have always longed deep inside of me to have a dad. I now I have one.